Now I've Found You
by miss mcGonagle
Summary: Filius learns that Pomona returns his love only to have her taken away. Songfic.The worlds first angsty FilMona fic.


**It was inevitable, really, that I, the Angsty Hufflepuff herself, would write an angsty fic about the worlds fluffiest ship. My deepest apologies to OSUSprinks for breaking her heart (yet again). So please, review and feel free to yell at me for hurting Fil and Mona. Just know that I found this song on a Bill/Laura (BSG) angst video and I _actually cried_.**

**This was written for a contest at The Hideaway. The fanvid featuring this song is on youtube and I would be happy to send the link to anyone who asks. I used all but a few lines of the song in this fic. For fluffy Charming Roots fics, go to my profile or check out the works of OSUSprinks and jayejaye78.**

**Disclaimer: The song is called "Now I've Found You" and belongs to the band Epicure. The following characters belong to JK Rowling and the ship belongs to myself, Sprinks and jaye. **

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Took a breath on my knees __Braced myself for what couldn't be __Lost myself in my mind __Threw caution to the wind_

Took a breath on my knees 

Filius had loved Pomona for years, but had never pursued a deeper relationship, wary of damaging their friendship. That had seemed best, considering that she might not feel the same. Until the night of Albus and Minerva's anniversary party, when there had been far too much wine. A sudden kiss had turned years of friendship into love's foreplay and as Filius held her in his arms that night he wondered how he had ever made it through a night without her by his side.

The next morning was a different story, his declaration of love brought tears and she rushed from his chambers with only a, "Fil, please don't". That evening together had changed everything; for Filius it had shown him how much he needed her in his life, but for Pomona, it seemed to have broken their friendship. It was days before he could convince her to sit down and talk to him.

It was then that she told him the truth. That she was dying. That her illness was slowly taking over and that all the medical knowledge in the Wizarding world would not be able to save her. Through her tears, Pomona whispered that she loved him, but that it was best for both of them if they remained as friends. Perhaps as friends, the heartache would be lessened. Perhaps.

But it was too late for Filius, and with a gentle kiss, he pledged his heart to her for as long as she lived and everyday afterwards.

"I don't want you to regret this." She was offering him a way out, but he passed it up.

"No regrets. I love you."

_Now I've found you you're leaving me __Distance won't kill this love __Now I've found you you're going away __One last kiss to send you on your way_

The desperate unfairness of the situation was not lost upon Filius, or upon Pomona. Finally finding their love reciprocated only to have a time limit set to their hearts was cruel, but when his heart grew heavy, it was Pomona who held him up, whose cheerful spirit kept them going even as her body weakened.

_I got lost in your eyes __Swear I'd die but I felt alive __I knew it had to end but not so soon __Throw all that to the wind_

Despite the illness that exhausted her body, those days were filled with joy for Pomona who woke each morning to the tender eyes of the man she adored, who cared for her and made her smile through her pain. She felt foolish for holding him at a distance for so long when they could have shared so much more of their lives together, but she was happy now to have him by her side. Even though it broke her heart to know that she would soon have to leave him.

Mere months after Pomona and Filius had opened their hearts to one another, the disease took a stronger hold upon her body. Unable to get out of bed, Pomona did her best to cry only when Filius was away, not wishing to cause him any further pain. The heartache was written clearly across his dear features, but he too hid his tears and did not waste their remaining time with sorrow, but with flowers, quiet declarations of love, and tender kisses.

_Now I've found you you're leaving me __Distance won't kill this love __Now I've found you you're going away __One last kiss and I'll send you on your way_

The end was drawing closer, Pomona's breath came in short gasps and for the first time in her life, it was an effort to smile. Her lifelong friends, Minerva and Poppy, had kept her company throughout the day, the other women curled up on either side of their dying friend, the three of them unable to stop the tears that coursed down their faces. Filius had given them time to say goodbye, but there was an unspoken agreement among them all that he would be left alone with Pomona during her final moments.

He watched from the doorway as Poppy and Minerva kissed Pomona's face and smoothed her hair, squeezing her hands before they left, leaning on one another for support.

Filius quietly set a fresh vase of tulips on the nightstand and perched himself on the edge of the bed. He caressed the back of her hand as it lay on the sheet; for the first time in all the years he had know her, there was no dirt under her fingernails. Tears filled his eyes as he thought about how she had been unable to work in her greenhouses for weeks now. Pomona opened her eyes and watched him, her eyes tired and sad, but full of love for the man before her.

"Any regrets?" she asked, her voice unable to reach higher than a whisper.

Filius looked at her wasted form and then down at her hand. He carefully picked it up and held it between his own before meeting her eyes once again.

"I wouldn't take back these past few months for anything, Mona love," he told her. The tears slipped from his eyes and his throat constricted as he tried to speak again. "My only regret is that I didn't tell you how I felt sooner."

Pomona smiled and sighed, closing her eyes.

"No regrets, Fil," she whispered.

He nodded and leaned forward to kiss her lips softly even as she slipped away to the afterworld.

"I love you."

_I'll send you on your way __I wouldn't take it back __No I wouldn't take it back for anything_


End file.
